Culture Essay > Culter Essay

2015 4 28

Why do I go to Kyoto?

I meant to write these words prior to my departure but piles of work have made me end up in finishing it at Kyoto.

20 years had passed since I returned to Seoul from living in the States for around 20 years. My polite decline had given up to the relentless persuasion by the Korean Government for me to take the role as Barbara Walters of Korean Broadcasting. Many current-affairs broadcast programs were aired through KBS (Korean Main TV Channel) under my planning and supervision upon return as expected. Of all the wonderful results beyond imagination and sometimes sky-rocket problematic matters, the most significant treasures in my memory linger among petty trivial things of a normal day-to-day living.

At first, I would casually smile back at any strangers walking towards me as I would in the United States. Later, I found these strangers with nonchalant faces turning their heads back and wonder whether they knew this woman by any chance only. My smiles continued with determination to make the world a better place. 10 years had passed when I realized that I too had withered and become accustomed to these non-expressive ways of this environment.

Although a female that I am, rudely enough that people continue their quest into my age. It became an impertinent daily routine of a conversational topic. Even to this day, I wonder why this becomes a topic of any conversation to begin with. If we were to focus on minds to the core essence of life, a life which is shorter than one line poem, perhaps then, we would have so much more to talk about.

Oh, the various examples are endless.

I should stand firm to lead others to a better path, yet I question whether I myself am imbued also.

The more I worked and carried on with the daily routines of life, the more my heart and body become weighed down. As such, 20 years had passed. My thoughts wondered to long for others who took a similar paths as I have and had returned back to the US as well as a distant recollection of voices advising me to go back to a country that is comfortably free from the worries of war. So, I think that the time has come for me to perhaps venture overseas to recharge from wounded and worn out emotional state of mine.

Contrarily, people my age would return back to their homeland. For me, I have left a lot of tasks back home as well hence going and coming back 15 hours each way to and from Washington itself in a way is also a task in itself.

As I think back on the past 10 years of my frequent visits to Japan, it mostly consisted of either speeches or poetry recitations but never long enough. Still, it astounds me that although I am more accustomed to the US, I am known more as a frequenter and expert of Japan through media representations of my writings of Korea and Japan.

In such case, I thought I should look deeper into Japan Society and Japan itself. We look so much alike and have overlapping ancestors tracks yet why do we continue to clash here and there? Whenever I present speeches or even during the times that I published two poetry books in Japanese as well as sending out "Lee Seung-shin Culture Essays" to Japanese fans, although I proofread and edit all translations, my mind is uneasy knowing that I didn't study even a day in Japan.

Moreover, it is detrimental heartache that the relations between our neighboring country has become so hardened for such a long period when me and my mother have worked our entire life to bettering sensitive bilateral relations between Korea and Japan by means of the core essence of art which is the literature.

Whenever I visit Kyoto, the hometown of Japan's national treasure Manyunzib (A collection of the best short poems where short word counts match like a verse from 1400 years past) and a thousand years capital, I take a stroll around the 150 years old historical campus of the prestigious private Doshisha university. The top-class recognized Dongjisa University is located next to Japan's Emperor Kosho's (御所) holy shrine. As I walked the walks of this renown Christian campus and the beautiful olden red brick chapel since its foundational years, a Japanese professor, a stranger, approached me by asking "Aren't the Japanese Apricot Flowers simply splendid?," as I replied how wonderful it must be to teach in such a place and he then, led me to a pile of application papers to study at Doshisha

After which a year had passed and I received an acceptance letter to teach here as I stand today next to Korean representative poets memorial headstone of Yoon Dong-ju alongside Jung Ji-yong after I took a qualification verification exam. For this, I simply flew to Japan with only a suitcase, leaving behind everything as well as tasks inside Korea. Although overwhelmed with joy at following the footsteps of the spirit of great Korean historical poets left around 70 years past during Japanese colonial occupation of Korea, at the same time, I find myself slightly tense in taking up the challenge of such a daunting task.

Planted next to the memorial headstone are Korea's national flower Mugunghwa, rose of Sharon and high above my head are almost as if a universe, mounds like umbrella of symbolic Japan's Cherry Blossom about to sprout into fireworks of blossom.

I come without fear yet slightly in awe at what lies ahead, prayerful that I may take on the challenge to walk following the step of Yoo, Kwan-soon. Perhaps, the missing clue to our neighboring relationship lies not only looking towards solutions among the heads of countries but rather by small steps taken by actual relationships built as I venture to do so myself with this new task laid upon me, a chance to also re-energize as if I retrospect to the years of study and immerse myself into a deeper understanding of inner core of self-being which in itself is a rare opportunity to treasure.

Surely, I find staying for a couple of days versus a long period is quite different indeed already.

I ask for your continued support and encouragement in this new endeavors.